Did you have to think very long to find something to fill in
the blank, or did the answer come to you immediately? Whatever the subject, was
that the first time you’ve thought about feeling grateful for it today? If so,
don’t feel too guilty—it may be the result of how the human brain evolved with
something called negativity bias.
In short, our brains are prehistorically hardwired for
survival by perceiving and reacting to dangers and risks. According to
psychologist Rick Hanson, author of ‘Hardwiring Happiness’,
negative experiences are immediately stored in memory, but a positive
experience usually needs to be held in awareness for 12 seconds or more to be
stored in long-term memory. Remembering
and focusing more on negative experiences may have kept our ancestors alive,
but today it makes us feel needlessly worried, tired, inadequate, irritated,
and stressed.
So what’s a modern-day human being to do?
Luckily, researchers have found ways to counterbalance our
brains’ negativity bias through simple habits, like keeping a gratitude journal. Yes, really. Feeling
skeptical? The study of gratitude and happiness has been gaining popularity in
psychological and social science. There is an increasing amount of research
from academic powerhouses like Yale, [1] Berkeley, and
the University of Pennsylvania [2] on the nature of gratitude, its
causes, and its potential effects.
It turns out that focusing on the positive things in our
life has scientifically proven benefits. According to multiple studies,
increasing conscious awareness of what we’re thankful for improves mental
health, enhances empathy, self-esteem, resilience, and general well-being.
[3] This is why world-renowned life coach Tony Robbins has gratitude as a key part of
his morning ritual: He spends a few minutes every morning focusing on things in
his life that he feels grateful for. Robbins says, “The antidote to fear is
gratitude. The antidote to anger is gratitude. You can't feel fear or anger while
feeling gratitude at the same time.”
Go back to the subject of your gratitude for a moment, the
thing you filled in the blank with. Hold it in your mind for at least 12
seconds. Did your mood change when you changed your focus?
Choosing Gratitude: The
Journaling Exercise
A simple way to make gratitude a part of your daily life is
to start keeping a gratitude journal. Each morning, take a minute to write down
at least three things you feel grateful for. So you’re not writing down the
same things every time (my job, my kids, my house), try to pick things other than the
same people and possessions. You can feel thankful for something small but
pleasant (the
cool breeze on my face this morning), the qualities of someone you
might admire (my
dad who always calls each week to catch up), or even a physical
state (the
energy I have to run up the stairs today). Some healthy habits are
hard to maintain, but this one is easy, and better yet, free. Start practicing
this exercise regularly and remembering gratitude, and gradually changes will
start to take place in your life. You may find new, great things coming into
your life because this shift in focus leaves you open to receiving positive
experiences and love.
Give it a try and see if it
works for you.
As we express our gratitude, we must never
forget that the highest appreciation is not to utter words, but to live by
them. --John F. Kennedy
[1] Emmons RA, et al. "Counting Blessings
Versus Burdens: An Experimental Investigation of Gratitude and Subjective
Well-Being in Daily Life," Journal of Personality and Social Psychology
(Feb. 2003): Vol. 84, No. 2, pp. 377–89. Available online at http://ei.yale.edu/wp-content/uploads/2013/11/jclp22020.pdf
[2] Seligman MEP, et al. "Empirical
Validation of Interventions," American Psychologist (July–Aug. 2005): Vol.
60, No. 1, pp. 410–21.
[3] The
Importance of Gratitude, http://www.umassd.edu/counseling/forparents/reccomendedreadings/theimportanceofgratitude/
